Simplicity and directness. They’re my core values. They shape the way I work and how I help clients. In today’s world of short attention spans and crowded inboxes, you either get to the point or you get lost in the crowd. You either inform your readers or confuse them; persuade them or alienate them. Success or failure lies in properly defining your purpose and audience; arranging your material logically and coherently; and writing precisely and succinctly.
I write on behalf of clients and also copy-edit their work. The former needs no explanation, but the latter deserves a few words. Copy-editing is not mere nip-and-tuck work. It requires hard scrutiny of a document and its component parts – right down to the last word and full stop. Here’s how my three-step editorial service can ensure your communication is right on target.
1. IDENTIFY PURPOSE AND AUDIENCEMany documents fail at the first hurdle because they’re trying to serve too many purposes or speak to too many audiences. Often authors do not consciously consider or articulate either. Or their document professes to speak to one audience, but in reality addresses another. Audience identification is crucial; it determines tone, assumptions about levels of knowledge and the purpose behind the communication. There can be several audiences, but only one prime audience. |
2. EVAULUATE THE STRUCTUREStructure and content are intertwined, making it difficult to set any hard-and-fast rules. Content usually has its own logical way of expression. (Clue: check the extent of cross-referencing.) The standard approach of starting with an introduction and gradually building up to a conclusion doesn’t work in this internet age. Readers want the conclusions first, followed by supporting or explanatory information in order of diminishing importance. |
3. WORD-BY-WORD EDITINGThis is where the hard yards begin. Copy-editing takes time: every word, sentence, paragraph, heading and subheading is scrutinised. Does each sentence make immediate sense? The need to read second time is a sure sign of problems. Is each word pulling its weight? If not, it’s redundant. Are verbs frequently passive? The voice is probably ponderous. Are there faulty assumptions, inconsistencies in tone, an overreliance on acronyms and jargon? What about spelling and grammatical errors? The checklist is very long, but the result is not: crisp, precise English. |
Confidentiality prevents me from divulging the before-and-after results of my work. But here’s a sample of pieces taken from the internet.
BEFORE:The 2016–17 year was an important one for Inland Revenue. It was a year of setting the foundations for, and taking the first step in, our transformation. It was also a year of designing our future organisation, continuing to consult with the public on how we can make tax simpler, playing our part in international efforts to encourage multinationals to comply and continuing to work with other agencies to create better public services for New Zealanders. |
AFTER:This year we took the first step in transforming our IT system - a long-awaited and truly significant accomplishment. There were some related achievements too: we made progress redesigning our organisation; we continued public consultation about how to simplify the tax system; and we’re now closer to getting multinationals to comply with their tax obligations. |
BEFORE:Westpac has engaged Deloitte Access Economics to explore and measure the benefits of diversity, with a particular focus on gender in management positions, in the New Zealand economy. The analysis in this report is based on primary research and data analysis, as well as a review of relevant literature. Specificially, we: |
AFTER:We asked Deloitte Access Economics to look at how many women are employed as managers compared with men, and to measure the benefits to the economy of hiring more women in such roles. In preparing this report, Deloitte reviewed relevant literature, analysed existing data and undertook research of its own. It also surveyed 500 businesses in different regions and sectors of New Zealand’s economy and used computer modelling to calculate the economic benefits of women playing a greater management role. |
BEFORE:The Fair Trading Act applies to both accidental and deliberate conduct, so a compliance programme can pick up mistakes and oversights which could otherwise land a business in trouble. Remember, also, that a business is responsible for the actions of its staff and agents. |
AFTER:Compliance programmes can pick up mistakes or oversights that breach the Fair Trading Act 2012. (The Act applies to accidental as well as deliberate conduct by a business, its staff or agents.) Businesses must ensure the information about their products and services is accurate and does not omit important information that will deprive potential customers of the ability to make an informed choice. An effective compliance programme can help establish a legal defence against a prosecution under the Act. It may also result in more lenient penalties for breaches that occurred despite diligent supervision. |
My name is Peter Riordan. I offer communications services and advice to a range of public and private sector clients. Sometimes I’m asked to help manage a media crisis – or to help prevent one. I’m often asked to draft or edit reports, submissions, speeches and communcations plans. And frequently I help in government or independent reviews and inquiries. Examples include the government inquiry into the Fonterra botulism crisis, the review of the Veterans’ Support Act, and the inquiry into government agencies’ handling of offender Tony Robertson.
Over the years, I’ve tackled jobs as varied as preparing advertising copy, editing online news websites, freelance travel writing and manuscript editing. For many years I was a newspaper sub-editor, so I understand how to get a job done under pressure. I thrive on a challenge. And I love travel (I’ve written three award-winning travel books).
I charge by the hour because it’s very hard to say how long a job may take. Projects evolve, clients change the scope (or their minds), other people’s input varies in quality – it’s all up in the air. But one thing doesn’t change: my commitment to quality.